Honestly this is me looking back at an article I did last year, and making new comments. New thoughts and comments will appear in italics. For those of you who are uneducated, italics are those funny leaning letters.
Miyamoto was shocked that fans still wanted a new F-Zero game. Even Wipeout is still going strong as fans still like high speed futuristic racing. The 3ds and WiiU both need a solid F-Zero entry as the mini-game in Nintendoland made us want more. Hell they could probably do a “Greatest hits” of sorts with tracks from F-Zero games of the past redone on the consoles. They wouldn’t even really have to change anything, Mario Kart hasn’t really had to either and that franchiseis still strong as ever and fun as Hell (Aside one ignorant reviewer who claims it changes nothing, then praises Call of Duty) . Maybe they could make a Mii Version, make your own F-Zero racer and race in GP’s against other 3ds/WiiU owners. It would be pretty bitchin’.
Now within the last few months, its become kind of apparent that F-Zero and Metroid probably aren’t going to get any love anytime soon. While fans still want it, we get cock teased with Nintendoland and Mario Kart 8 DLC. While I’m both happy and annoyed Nintendo is hopping on the DLC bandwagon, I just wish they would put their efforts into a full-fledged F-Zero. I’m still holding out a tiny flicker of hope that Miyamoto will revisit this like Star Fox and surprise us all. steering with the gamepad was odd, but I can see that being doable with some tweaking. They could do like Mario Kart and make both original and classic revisit cups. Then again, with all of the awesome music, I’d probably just spend a day in a sound test listening to remixes of my favorite tracks.
…There are 2 people who make me hate this franchise. One was a rabid Star Fox fan in college, the other has a very unhealthy obsession with Fox/Falco porn. A very LARGE unhealthy obsession. Anyhow… I’ve played a lot of flight sims over the years so while Star Fox isn’t a great flight game, you cant deny there is a HUGE fan base for this game. Star Fox is as much about the characters as it was the flying, and gamers connected with Fox, Falco, Slippy, that rabbit and Fox’s slutty girlfriend… who now magically can fly an Arwing? What kills me is that the F-Zero Arcade game (FZERO AX or whatever) was a blast and you can bring your ship from the Gamecube (That ancient system many kids don’t know of) and play it in arcades. Long story short, if Nintendo keeps making Metroid and Mario Kart, they should keep Star Fox going too. It’s not like they don’t already have like a chunk of the cast modeled for Smash Brothers…
No I’m not joking. If fucking Killer Instinct is getting a next gen title, a 3 player hyper-violent beat em up where you drill rat-aliens into the ground should be there too. I STILL play Battletoads to this day, it’s a blast, the music is great and the levels (in all versions) are amazing. People still talk about how difficult Volkmire’s Inferno is and the Turbo Tunnel is one of the most recognized and infuriating levels in a game to date. My sister and I played this a lot as a kid and its one of the few games where co-op doesn’t help make the game simpler. Beat em ups are few and far between these days, Castle Crashers and Scott Pilgrim being the big mainstream titles, while games like Fist Puncher cover the indie circuit. I say bring back Zitz, Rash and Pimple and give us a bit of the old school 1990’s awesomesauce that Ninja Turtles lost (thanks Nickelodeon)
Zombies Ate My Neighbors
Like I wouldn’t bring this up. Seriously.
It’s been almost 20 years since Julie and Zeke defeated Doctor Tongue, and a few games have tried to capture the nostalgia. I’m not counting Ghoul Patrol because while it was a sequel, it didn’t feel quite right… and it was really bloody short comparatively. Now we have 4 player support, online communities, a vast interactive landscape zombies could roam in… who says they have to come up with new neighbors? Hell they could make this a 3ds/WiiU title, the radar on one screen the game on another, make the ‘victims’ Mii’s and you have infinite victims. Hell you could include a level creation tool (which Lucas Arts had and it was awesome) and you would bring new life into a cult classic. Modernize it a bit (or at least bring it to the 80’s horror film wise) and with the classic weapons you could easily breathe new life into a great concept.
I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but nothing is more satisfying than taking a chain and smacking someone in the face with it, knocking them off of their bike. Road Rash was a great racing game, and the final entry (Jailbreak) was lame. Road Rash was to motorcycles like Burnout was to cars, it was the over the top racing game that was unique among everything. I spent hours cruising in Road Rash 3d (I.E. start a race and turn off wherever I wanted and just drove) looking at the (low-poly) environments. A next gen sequel would be nice, but Hell, even a 2d one would be awesome, as long as they took the time and did it right, Road Rash would make another amazing option for the non-mainstream racing audience. Instead of ‘clans’ you have motorcycle gangs, you could instigate gang races in a large environment, upgrade your bikes and even do custom paint jobs (Forza did it) …I think EA owns this, so of course the trade off is probably having Burger King slap you with his crown during a race…
Fuck Madden, fuck EA Sports (aside SSX) fuck releasing the exact goddamn game year after year. You want to update the roster? FUCKING DLC not a whole new horseshit game.
*Rage-flips a table*
That being said, why not give us who find American Football boring as shit (Proper footy gets a true fan up at 4 am to watch it) what we want? Kill the ref, blow holes in the field and break the quarterback in 2. Mutant league games were odd, violent and fun as hell. In this online based gaming world, create a team, join a league online and play for the championship. Mutant League could also offer ALL THE SPORTS! American Football, Hockey, Baseball (Turn the ball into a bomb and kill the batter, they don’t swing, it kills your catcher) and I guess basketball. I don’t get sports, but I live in a state where our only winning team is the WNBA team. Maybe if our teams won I wouldn’t give two shits if they got a new stadium.